CPS rule

I remember seeing memes like this a bunch back when I used reddit, and being a bit confused about what to make of them, because on the one hand the showcased feelings are usually quite relatable to me, but on the other I feel pretty confident that I didn’t suffer abuse as a kid and if anything had a pretty good childhood compared to most people I know.

I’ve just ended up with a sort of “constantly worry about everything while not seeing to know how to function in situations that I feel I should know how handle” out of a combination of anxiety disorders and ASD instead, among others. I’m never sure if I should feel lucky to not go through that kind of childhood trauma or unlucky that my brain apparently has ended up functioning in such a manner regardless. Somehow I can think of a way that either one of those feelings could be disrespectful to someone that did go through it all and that just makes my confusion worse.

I feel your situation resonate with me so maybe this’ll help.

I’ve recently been diagnosed for PTSD due to neglect. Not extreme neglect like locking me up or abandoning me or anything. Just an emotionally exhausted and depressed widowed mother and an inability to connect with most my family.

My brain is deeply unsatisfied by this explanation, to the point of searching for a repressed memory or almost “envying” what I considered “real trauma”.

But it is just that simple, I was emotionally neglected as a child combined with undiagnosed ADHD, Autism, Depression, and being trans. This has resulted in PTSD that got so bad that thunder gave me a panic attack from inside my bedroom.

It’s rage inducing how unsatisfying that is.